Although I don't recall the specifics our first encounter, familiarity grew over time. I rarely feel burdened by his presence, but at times his company distracts and hinders complete spontaneity and freedom... as a full pitcher, with water threatening to splash over the edges if not handled with care.
An overall sense of foundation and security accompanies his presence. I find relief in his willingness to shoulder any burden I carry. With every additional weight that is borne, I feel an increase in his presence... a heightened awareness. Still, I remain grateful.
Quick tears and edgy emotions are telling signs that his presence is too near, too heavy. In such times, rest and time appease... encouraging him to fade for a moment. But, each instance of close proximity readjusts priority and focus, renewing reminders.
He carries an everlasting patience and wisdom, built from the very elements of his being...created by tears and sorrows and heartbreak and discouragement. These emotions are drawn from countless tales, each holding a unique level of tragedy and weight.
Through his presence, depth is given.. understanding made possible... empathy becomes intrinsic. But, despite the benefits of the companionship, an accompanying desire to disappear into the west occurs. Also tempting is to join the Tarahumara, to run in the deserted hills of Mexico.
But, in the end... I am compelled to remain, sustained by his very presence and purpose. At once I despise, while adore. I am graced by the aid he provides, and cursed by the continual reminder.
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